Wednesday, 7 June 2017

...and that's when I realised I had left the salami behind.


You're here.... 

Queen's Birthday...the official date for recognizing the Coronation of Elizabeth 2nd....is a Long Weekend and therefore a perfect day to get family together over lunch in the middle of winter: Here's how my attempt went.

Monday 5th June

7-30am. Sleet-like conditions outside so no dog-walk. 

9am Congratulate myself on simple lunch idea of Pizza in various toppings served to eat with a kitchen towel al camera (on your feet inside).

Shopping for this had already been done two days earlier (Sat) and all I had to do was tidy, prepare and compose myself.

Mr Tin Shed Yarns was proper crook (not well) with a lung infection so had taken himself off to his Art Studio instead. We stayed in touch by phone.

Mud from outside was being strictly kept at bay so dog paws and tummy were being washed in the laundry. Shaking was only allowed under a towel and ALL paw marks were wiped up.

Sounding slightly control-freakish? oh yes.

Dog and partner stayed very quiet.

11am go to kitchen to get out flat metal pizza-cooking tray. Find it has rusted and I have rust stains over one half of 4yr old (new in my world) kitchen shelves. Rust stain is fiercely removed in 20 mins and tray is thrown out. With the kitchen newly resplendent in bleach I prepare all the pizza-toppings.


Anchovies, sun-dried tomatoes, mushrooms and pitted olives.
I feel fine, totally in control. This lunch will be great. Family will be driving an hour to see me....and they will enjoy this relaxed affair. 

11-30am Sit down for 30 mins to knit.

12 noon Check messages " Won't be there till 2-ish, sorry"

Actually that's fine. Gives me an hour extra for knitting. 

Go to get pizza bases out of the freezer. No pizza bases.
A chill wind goes up my back. Brain says " But I got them on Sat"

PANIC
BREATHE
"You forgot them at the supermarket".

Without time to argue with myself on the subtleties of The Consumer Guarantees Act about the rights of the mad woman who leaves a bag of shopping behind and therefore is entitled to a replacement, I go to the car....maybe it is there in the back. Nope.

And then I knew I had to go back to the supermarket because I had thrown the receipt away under a smelly dog-bone and anchovy lids and it was two days ago already.


Aware she has been a right twit, she took a long calming look at her clean, tidy living room
before getting into the car and driving back to the supermarket.

12-30pm Try to act like a woman who has laughingly forgotten one small item instead of the actual basis of the entire meal. Fortunately said supermarket is only 5 mins away.

12-50pm More cool than cucumber I arrive back with pizza bases AND am armed with  bottle of prosecco for later.

1pm Continue being Kitchen Queen. Everything ready.

This visit includes my 2 yr old grandson so tidy is more appropriate than clean (apart from previously mentioned kitchen shelves). The bathroom is checked and toilet is disinfected. I'm ready.

Sit and knit and breathe.

2pm Go to get Deli meat packets out from fridge for pizza. Left them until last due to food safety.


lots and lots of swearing

Brain now remembers and mentions something about the check-out girls who helped you on Saturday morning with your bags. You put four in the trolley, there must have been five.

Your part of the brain shouts back.."..I know..."

(and there are other words too....)

...and the deli meats were in with the pizza-bases....

With the prospect of a meatless pizza lunch ahead for her guests, she congratulates herself on making available "Healthy Options" for her family.


There are times when you can turn on a sixpence and make a new story...and so the Meatless Pizza was born. No-one batted an eyelid, and everyone smiled.

Meatless Pizza

And all relaxed. The grandson was really only interested in the toy Parking Garage I found at the local Recycling Centre...

Cool Car Garage at Nana's house

They ate and talked until the sun began to go down (5pm) and then left with a tired boy.

I cleaned up, opened the Prosecco and talked to Mr Tin Shed Yarns and NEVER SAID A WORD about leaving the salami behind.













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